For several years, Susan and I coached couples in our home and led the marriage ministry at a small church in Texas. It is one of the most fulfilling things we have ever done together and we both fell in love with the couples that participated in weekend video series like, “Laugh Your Way Through Marriage” and long-form book studies like, “Love And Respect”. Today, a week before our own anniversary, contemplating our own marriage, I am thinking about why that work is so special to us and it occurs to me that on our own, we aren’t necessarily all that good at the whole marriage thing. You see…

Growing up, neither one of us had parents that were together. So without that example, we decided we should try marriage God’s way. After all, isn’t that what marriage is? An earthly example of Christ and the Church? That’s the way we see it. Not that we have been perfect at it. Especially ME! The knowledge alone of what to do does not make us experts. I think what made the work successful is that God HAD to do it. — Want me to play a few songs on the guitar? No problem. Get up and lead Worship Music? I got it. Lead a married couples group? Uh… wait a minute! I must learn to “not lean on my own understanding” all of a sudden.

Is it possible, that Churches who administer a ‘test’ to find out what a person is best at in order to put them in the “right” place in ministry, actually may have it backwards? It might actually make more sense to find out our weaknesses so that HE may be made strong.

It is in our weakness that His strength is most evident, right?

Marriage is difficult for anyone. Over half of all marriages fail. Even Christian ones. I don’t know of anything worthwhile that isn’t difficult however and I still believe that it is our best opportunity to display Christ and His love for the Church… AND actually experience that on this earth. That is, IF we are willing to come at it with that result as our goal. –And I get it: It’s good to have a mate that will love you for the rest of your life, through good times and bad, through sickness and in health… all that. But those words alone will not make it easy. Choosing love, giving up your way for another in order to show love; that is where we make marriage happen.

That is what God did for His Church.

In thinking of all the book studies and DVDs we have been through in order to learn how to make our marriage the best it can be, I realized this:

Being in conversation about marriage and working together on the nuts-and-bolts of marriage with other couples have made the most difference.

Also, apparently the numbers go from 1 out of 2 in divorce to like 1 out of over 1000 for people who are in conversation with other couples about healthy marriage. But it’s not always easy to maintain those couple-to-couple relationships. I also have noticed that most of the books and videos are by a Doctor or a Pastor. So, Susan and I have decided to start a podcast as just regular folks. We will talk about the issues we have had and the good, the bad and the ugly… and oftentimes humorous things that happen to everyday married folks like us. We will answer questions and also interview other ordinary people who are making marriage work, and those who have been a help to us over the years.

If you would like to get information on how to get the podcast when it’s available (it is FREE), and/or would like to participate in any way, please comment below, and register for the email in the upper right hand corner. We will get the information out that way. Also, I hope you’ll share by clicking the Facebook and Twitter share buttons.

I am praying that God blesses the hands of everyone reading this! Thanks!

Ken

PS: I am doing some research on couples that have been married for 50 years or more. If you know (or ARE) a couple, that would be willing to talk with me, please shoot me an email or comment on Facebook and I will message you privately for their info. Thank you and God bless you!